GENITALS: FEMALE 53. The Vulva Stroke 53.The Vulva Stroke This is a series of strokes on each outer and inner lip. With a thumb on one side of a lip and the index finger on the other side, very gently squeeze and slide off the edge of the lip. Alternating your hands, continue this pattern along the entire length of each lip. 78 54. The Clitoris Stroke A. Now you center your stroking around the head of the clitoris, which is just beneath where the inner lips merge together at the upper part of the vulva. To begin, slide the middle finger pad of your right hand up and down several times between the inner and outer lips on one side of the vulva and then on the other side. B. With one or two fingers, slowly massage circles around the clitoral head, several times in one directions, then several times in the other direction. c. With a single finger pad, begin a very slow, upward stroke at the vaginal entrance, up through the inner lips, up past the clitoral head. Repeat several times. GENITALS: FEMALE 54. The Clitoris Stroke 54. A 54. B 54. C Erotic Massage 79 GENITALS: FEMALE 55. The Clock 55. A 55. The Clock A. For this intravaginal massage, imagine a clock at the vaginal entrance, with twelve o'clock near the clitoris and six o'clock near the anus. Your left palm rests on the abdomen. At the twelve-o'clock position slowly introduce your right thumb into the vagina until its pad is pressing upward on the underneath side of the pubic bone. Now gently rock your right arm and hand back and forth about an inch. After about fifteen seconds or longer, lighten your pressure, slide your thumb to the one-o'clock position, and begin to rock again. Continue in this fashion until about the seven-o'clock position. 80 B. At about seven o'clock, shift to using your index finger and continue with the rocking pattern up through twelve o'clock. GENITALS: FEMALE The Clock 55. B Erotic Massage 81 GENITALS: FEMALE 56. The G-Spot Stroke 56. A 56. The G-Spot Stroke A. This stroke may be easier if you bring your lover's knees up with both feet resting on the table. Your left palm rests on the abdomen. At the twelve-o'clock position slowly introduce your right index and middle fingers into the vagina until the finger pads are pressing upward above (beyond) the pubic bone. (This is approximately the Q-Spot area inside the vagina.) Here make a "come here" finger movement to stroke your finger pads across the membranous tissue. Vary the pressure to find what feels best — if there is pain, lighten the pressure or discontinue the stroking. 82 B. With your right hand continuing Part A, rest the heel of your left hand on the lower abdomen. now allow your left-hand fingers to delicately stroke the clitoral head at the same time. (Perhaps apply a little pressure on the lower abdomen with the heel of your left hand.) When you complete the stroke, slide your lover's legs back to the flat position. GENITALS: FEMALE The G-Spot Stroke 56. B Erotic Massage 83 GENITALS Note: Starting with this stroke, the male and female genital massage description is the same. 57. Inner Connections In this series of strokes you connect the enjoyable sensations of the genitals with the enjoyable sensations of other parts of the body. 57. Inner Connections 57. A A. Abdomen and Genitals While your right hand massages the genitals (in any fashion) let your left hand knead or make circular strokes on the abdomen (For a description of kneading, see stroke #9.) 84 GENITALS Inner Connections B. Breast Area and Genitals As your right hand continues as in Part A, slide your left hand from the same lower, outer side of the breast area up over the breast so that your thumb and index finger encircle the nipple. Using the nipple as the axis, continue the stroke by rotating your left hand clockwise around the nipple as you slide up and off the breast. Repeat several times on the right breast area and continue Part C on the right side of the neck before going to the left side. 57. B Erotic Massage 85 GENITALS Inner Connections 57. C 57. D C. Shoulder/Neck and Genitals While your right hand continues as in Part A, knead the right shoulder and neck muscles with your left hand. (For a description of kneading, see stroke #9.) Be careful not to squeeze the throat. Repeat several times. D. Inner Thigh and Genitals Now your hands change positions: your left sliding down to massage the genitals while your right kneads the right inner thigh. 86 E. Change Sides If it is possible, move to the other side and follow the same sequence while simply reversing the left-hand and right-hand instructions. (If you cannot easily move to the over side, modify your stroking so that the left breast, neck/shoulder, and thigh areas are massaged also.) Once you complete this series, move back to your lover's right side for the following instructions. (Remember to keep hand contact if possible.) GENITALS Inner Connections 57. E Er Women’s Tantric Massage Preparation for initiation into Tantra includes developing awareness of the body’s energy field and opening of the Third Eye, deepening spiritual awareness. Yoga is an ideal preparation, particularly Tantric or Kriya yoga traditions. In western practice, also called Neo-Tantra, massage is frequently a starting point. Body work is very popular in the West, especially in cities where you can usually have your choice of Esalen, Shiatsu, Swedish, Rosen Method or any one of a dozen other types of massage. Usually this type of body work is sought for relaxation and overcoming the stress of daily life. The goals of Tantric massage are different and are varied, depending on the student, but can be put under two broad general headings: (1) physical awareness and full presence in physical sensation and energy flow through the body, and (b) spiritual awareness, transcendence or a state often shorthanded as bliss. When I began serious pursuit of Tantra study, I interviewed prospective teachers (and they interviewed me). I had been doing mantra meditation for about thirty years and had periodically book-studied Tantra and tried a few practices. So for my first teacher I chose an apprentice in Western or Neo-Tantra who was studying with well known teachers in this new branch off the old tree. Thursday, May 9th My first session with G was wonderful. She is exactly as open, honest and businesslike as she seemed on the phone. She has a marvelous gift for maintaining a professional relationship without being distant or formal. She’s pleased that our emphasis is on the spiritual aspects of Tantra rather than just the physical. We began by talking about what I wanted from the session and what my goals are over the next few months. I didn’t really have a goal for yesterday, except to see if I felt she was trustworthy, and, of course, to see if she was any good at massage. I told her I wanted just to begin with the massage, talk as we went along, and flow wherever we were going. She seemed to like my not having any expectations, the first time. She does ask for goals, though, so I guess I need to come up with some. She began by connecting the chakras. Her energy is VERY dynamic, and she gives off heat almost like one of those rub-in creams with menthol! She worked first connecting the base and heart chakras, then the others, right up to the crown. The energy was flowing freely through all chakras when she finished. Then she began the massage. As she went along, she showed me some of the massage techniques she was using. She did a stroke a few times, then showed me the mechanics of it, then did it again for me. Very good. She focussed on the major joints (shoulders, hips) quite a lot, and on large muscle masses, especially the thighs. I was completely in my body, aware of every corpuscle, by the time she finished on my back, very relaxed, very body aware, feeling the energy flow very distinctly. She said to take my time, and turn over when I was ready. I felt floaty, not light-headed, but actually as though I was floating in air. The energy was almost a buzz that could be heard. She left the room for a few minutes, and I turned over slowly, feeling very relaxed and warm and letting energy flow. When she came back, she put one hand on my belly and the other on my heart, and the energy was so intense, it shot through me like an arrow. It came up to my third eye and rolled around in there; and it went down to the base chakra and vibrated. Amazing. My clit began to tingle with the vibration, and I felt surrounded by warmth and movement. Then she turned down the energy slowly, until there was just a comfortable buzz, and began working on my breasts. She massaged the whole breast, back under the arm to the lymph nodes, and the nipples. It’s almost all flat-handed and is fairly vigorous. I had told her my breasts can be very tender to pressure, and she was very good at applying just the right pressure without my having to stop her even once. She slowly moved again to place her hands on my solar plexus chakra and heart, continuing slowly to massage the breasts, lightly now, just applying a small bit of pressure with one hand. As she did this, we talked about the process, the energy, etc. She showed me an exercise of connecting the solar plexus to the third eye, with her hand at the back of my head. That chakra is very powerful when you see it as your whole brain, not just the eye itself. She continued to massage my breasts slowly and began focusing a little, but not completely, on the nipples. She experimented with different strokes and gauged immediately which ones raised the most energy. As she was doing this, she very slowly began moving her hand downward from my belly, less than an inch at a time. She picked her hand up, then placed it again, just a little further down. Each time she was feeling the energy, very conscious of whether I wanted to go there or not. She placed her hand on my mound, fingers downward, with her middle finger at the top of my slit. She massaged the mound for quite a while, taking all of my responses in. She looked mostly at my face, but also my body movements. Almost imperceptibly, her finger slid just inside the outer labia. She stopped there for several minutes. Then she slid her finger further inside, and I felt her energy flow get very dynamic again. She found my clit, then rested her fingers there for several minutes. Her energy literally vibrated. I could feel it wherever her hands touched flesh. It was a delicious feeling, not excited or aroused in the usual way, the imperative to get to orgasm; but fully aroused and experiencing it for what it was, fully aware and focussed on the energy flow connection she was making. She began slowly to massage my clit, using a lot of different strokes and observing which ones shot the energy upward into the chakras. She went excruciatingly slowly at first, encouraging me to experience each sensation fully. At the point that she saw orgasm was close, she began to massage more rhythmically, and to touch the head of my clit more. It built to orgasm fairly quickly, and she held me at the crest a couple of times before she brought on a full orgasm. She did that by massaging the head of my clit fairly vigorously until a few moments before, then squeezed my labia closed and vibrated them the last twenty seconds or so. The orgasm itself was expansive. The energy didn’t just explode, as it usually does; it radiated up my body to my solar plexus, then my heart, third eye and up; then down, into my pelvis, legs and feet. I distinctly felt the energy. It was very clear. It moved both along the surface of my skin and inside my tissues. Pretty amazing. Tantric massage techniques work in a particular way. After the orgasm, she massaged my whole yoni for a long time, raising the energy and holding it several more times. It felt good to be attended to in that way. Men forget that the whole yoni is sensitive, and that sensation from every part of it feeds into the energy explosion of orgasm. G withdrew her fingers slowly, in stages, the same as she had done in approaching. Then she rested her hands on solar plexus and heart chakras again, and we talked about the whole massage, how it felt, what I experienced. I lay there for about ten minutes, doing grounding exercises. When I finally stood up, I felt as though I’d slept for hours. I felt light and energized and cradled by Divine energy. We worked together for a few months; then G and I parted ways. She never gave me a full explanation, but I gathered that she was becoming more involved in a new business outside Tantra. So I searched again. As so often happens when you try to follow Right Action, I was profusely blessed when I met Jia, with whom I developed the true traditional teacher-student relationship. Over several months of working with Jia, I progressed to a traditional initiation in white Tantra. Here, then, is an early session with her. Jia greeted me with full-body hug, aligning our chakras. Then we sat on the mat in her studio, and she fed me three foods– sweet, salty and bitter, he said, “to awaken Shakti.” We gazed* for about fifteen or twenty minutes, first with hands on each other’s shoulders, then on knees, then palm to palm. After a few light touches on nadis here and there, she motioned for me to undress and gave me the same gorgeous yellow and orange sarong from last time. She first gave me a full body massage, very energizing first, then relaxing. It must have been about an hour, but I lose all concept of time when we’re working together. She paid particular attention to my breasts, heart chakra and second chakra. I could feel warmth and expansiveness increasing as she touched lightly, moved away and stroked elsewhere on my body, then moved back to my breasts, nipples and mons. She lightly tapped and vibrated my mons, stroking little butterfly touches at the edges of my labia. I could feel the wetness beginning. She got up slowly and left the room to wash the oil off her hands. When she came back in, she sat next to me, her hand on my heart chakra, and I put mine on her. The energy flow was like lightning! She said very softly, “Now, just stay relaxed. Don’t do anything, just feel the energy. I’ll place your legs and arms, don’t help me unless I say so. Just relax and be.” She touched nadis again for a few minutes and rested her hand for a moment on my mons, now getting wet from my oozing juices. Then she propped my legs up on pillows, with my whole yoni open to her, and again rested her hand on my mons, lightly caressing my thighs, belly and nipples with the other hand. Then she massaged my yoni very slowly, stroking every millimetre, sliding her fingers along my shaft, but not touching the tip directly. Then her focus started shrinking gradually, shorter strokes, to my opening. She squeezed rhythmically, gently, and stroked, for quite some time before sliding her fingers in and out, just about a half inch at first, then sliding in gradually deeper. She began very gently, slowly, then increased speed and pressure as I opened to her more. It’s the first time I’ve ever actually felt that spongy area expand. I mean, I’ve always known it does, but never felt it happening. She massaged the Sacred Spot for about forty minutes or so. I orgasmed in waves, really deep orgasms that heated up my whole pelvic region and spread up to my belly, sending energy through all my chakras. Then she spent almost as much time bringing me back down and getting me grounded as she’d spent on the massage. I lay there drifting for about ten minutes, and Jia sat close to me, comforting with her hand on my belly. When, eventually, I sat up, we talked about how she came to Tantra, some of her experiences and what I’d experienced that day with her. I found myself saying that I had felt something physically lifted from my body, as a shadow floating straight up, out of me. Also that I felt elation from that, but also had a clear knowledge that it was only the first of many shadows I need to release. She said there are Tantric and Taoist ways to speed the process if I like, but I said the pace I had now seems correct for me for the time being. The most interesting point was that none of this was about sex. It was about Divine creative energy. Even my orgasms, which were very powerful at the crests, were about the energy, not sexual gratification. It was odd to realize this at first, but, of course, the ENERGY is, in fact, what Tantra is about. Sexual behaviour is only the means –a very pleasant means, absolutely, but ONLY the means– to generate the Divine creative energy of Shakti. By generating this energy correctly, with intention, we can ultimately have union with the Divine. It’s so exciting to be on this trail. In all of this, the most profound realization is how much my capacity to love is expanding with every single Tantric practice. I love Ewan more every day, anyway. But my heart and soul is open to Jia, my teacher, in an entirely different way. I feel gratitude for knowing her, pleasure and hope in being with her, and desire to be eventually completely open to her, with nothing held back, even unconsciously. By opening up to her, more and more, I share with her that creative energy, more and more. The directness and intimacy of Tantra make possible loving without worrying why, or what might happen, or any of the stupid mind stuff that usually comes up. This love comes from sharing the creative energy, is based in that sharing, and is so much deeper and more complex than any romantic love could ever be.